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Step-Family Challenges and How to Manage Them

Step-Family Challenges and How to Manage Them

Cyndi Kay GreenMarch 7th, 2025|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

In recent years society has moved away from the term step-family and has started using blended family to describe the dynamics of a family created by spouses who have children from a previous relationship/marriage. Step-family challenges come from creating a family from two pre-existing families. The kids involved can be overwhelmed with conflicting emotions while parents try to navigate the new dynamics in the home. This blending of a stepfamily takes patience and effort. It can be painful to build new relationships because there are so many new interactions that must be navigated. But it can also be a beautiful thing when the parents choose to keep God in the midst. Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him. – Psalm 127:3, NIV Step-family Challenges and Managing Them Well Building a healthy family is challenging without the dynamic of being a step-family. When the addition of other family members gets thrown into the mix, there are complex situations that must be navigated to create a healthy family with healthy bonds. Creating a healthy and well-balanced home is attainable when the family, especially the parents, is intentional with untangling the fine threads of emotions, expectations, and experiences. New family roles As a couple with children comes together there will be new roles that will be established. Children and parents will each be subjected to a different dynamic when it comes to what their role in this new family becomes. Managing the challenge: The boundaries of these roles are important and should be respected. Parents must remember to be gentle in developing new relationships with their stepchildren. Different cultures Each family comes with its own culture and traditions. These differences can create tension if it seems as though only one set of cultures is being incorporated into [...]

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The Dangerous Hamster Wheel of a Materialistic Lifestyle

The Dangerous Hamster Wheel of a Materialistic Lifestyle

Kate MotaungFebruary 26th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

An actress once said, “The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.” We can sometimes get so caught up in doing something that we forget to ask whether we should be doing it at all, or how it could be shaping and changing us for the worse. The American dream far too often turns into a nightmare of epic proportions. By the time we realize it, we’re already hip-deep into it. The Lord made us as ensouled bodies, or embodied souls; whichever way you put it, we are spiritual and physical beings, made from the dust of the ground, but with the breath of God inside us (Genesis 2:7). Our bodies and spirits need sustenance, though we often find ourselves looking after one over the other. Our material needs can seem more pressing than other needs, leading us to value the things that meet those needs. If a person becomes materialistic, it can introduce an imbalance in their life that’s detrimental to their wellbeing. Why Materialism Is a Hamster Wheel Of the many things that Jesus spoke about, money was a frequent topic. He understood how anxious we get about what we will eat, drink, or wear, and a lot of His teaching was to help His disciples become free of the anxieties about these things (Matthew 6:19-34; Luke 12:13:34). When we don’t know what tomorrow brings, it seems our first instinct is to worry about it and try to future-proof our lives. Most of us wouldn’t call ourselves materialistic. Materialism can be understood as valuing physical or tangible things more than we value spiritual things. A materialist person could even be described as living as though the only reality, or the only one that matters, is what we can see, [...]

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Being Single and Maintaining Integrity in Today’s Society

Being Single and Maintaining Integrity in Today’s Society

Melissa PlantzJanuary 28th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Personal Development, Relationship Issues, Spiritual Development|

It seems like it is becoming harder to maintain integrity in today’s society. Social platforms and other media expose us to images and behaviors rapidly becoming the norm that goes against Godly living. So how do you continue to be a Christian while being single today, especially in the dating world? Being Single in the 21st Century More and more people are choosing to remain single longer as they focus on their education and pursue careers. But unfortunately, many also engage in long-term monogamous relationships instead of marriage. In some of these cases, people have felt pressured to conform to society’s norms. For example, a woman dreams of having a large wedding wearing a beautiful glittering gown and marrying the love of her life, giving him her virginity on her wedding night. But as the woman graduates high school and university and begins her career, she feels pressured to date more. Next, her friends tease her for not taking the next step with her boyfriend. She becomes confused and rationalizes her feelings for her boyfriend, eventually having sex with him. They maintain this relationship for a year before they break up. The woman meets someone new months later, and the cycle starts again. This is a common scenario because society no longer encourages marriage as the step before sex. Instead, it has become commonplace to have premarital sex and to move in with someone to gauge capability. But there was a reason God encouraged people to marry first; to avoid sexually transmitted diseases and to maintain morality. You do not have to devalue your integrity. Instead, you can face temptations and stand up to people. To do this you will need to be strong in your faith and stay deep in God’s word and prayer. The following is a [...]

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The Negative Effects of Consumerism on Our Mental Health

The Negative Effects of Consumerism on Our Mental Health

Jennifer KooshianDecember 26th, 2024|Depression, Featured, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

The story of our lives can be told by the various objects around us that we treasure. This isn’t all there is to us, to be sure, but it can say plenty about us. We have cherished books, furniture inherited from a beloved relative, sneakers or shoes that have their own shelves in a closet, pictures in frames that tell of treasured memories with loved ones, trinkets that are prominently displayed on the mantlepiece, and so much more. The things we own and treasure say a lot about us, but they can never tell the full story. Nor should they. Carl R. Trueman notes that when we become over-attached to our material goods and possessions to the point that our sense of meaning or worth is determined by them, we are caught up in consumerism. Consumerism can affect us in many ways, including our mental and emotional health. Living in a Consumer Society Our society is the most affluent in human history. That affluence may not be evenly distributed, but we’re living in a country where we can acquire goods and services cheaply, and things can be easily discarded, and new things obtained. Each year, there is a new iteration of some gadget or product, and the incessant message is that the new one is better, and you’re missing out if you still have the older version. Upgrade now! It’s made easy to simply “upgrade” to the new thing; incentives are offered, whether it’s trade-ins or some discount offered to draw you in. If it’s not that, with things like fast fashion, you can get items that are cheaply made and don’t cost much to buy. It’s easy to lean into the “buy two and get the third one free”, because why not? And because it’s [...]

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Signs of Employee Burnout to Look Out for

Signs of Employee Burnout to Look Out for

Kate MotaungNovember 21st, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Professional Development|

One of the many tasks that a manager or an employer undertakes is to look out for the well-being of his or her employees and help them avoid employee burnout. One could be transactional and cynical about this, and frame it as protecting one’s investment and bottom line, but it’s really about caring for others. Loving others as you love yourself means doing, where it’s up to you, what you can you help them flourish and be the best they can be. Whatever else they may be, the people who work for you or are under your authority are human beings made in God’s image. This implies many things, including their inherent dignity and worth. Being in authority over others carries the burden of responsibility and care for them. Just as you’re in charge of others and they are accountable to you, you are ultimately accountable to God for how you discharge your responsibilities (Colossians 4:1). As an employer or manager, one of the things to look out for among the people who work for you is work burnout. Some signs of employee burnout Burnout is the state of mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion that can overtake a person when they are overworked or placed under difficult conditions. When someone is stressed for an extended period and they don’t effectively relieve that stress, burnout may result. Some of the consequences of burnout will include people making avoidable mistakes, a lack of enthusiasm, and a decline in creativity. Some common signs of employee burnout to look out for include the following: Cynicism and detachment from work. Chronic fatigue and exhaustion. Increased absenteeism or tardiness. Presenteeism, which is when one is present but not being fully productive. Reduced productivity and performance; this may include procrastination. Lack of motivation, interest, and enthusiasm for [...]

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OCD Help: Understanding Rituals

OCD Help: Understanding Rituals

Stephanie KramerOctober 23rd, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, OCD|

Dealing with time-consuming rituals can be one of the most challenging aspects of living with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). While many with this disorder think conducting rituals will bring them peace, they often get the opposite result. When a ritual becomes too long or complicated, it can become a burden, leading to exhaustion. Read this article to find OCD help. These rituals, whether they involve constant checking, cleaning, or mental routines, often feel necessary at the time but can take over your day and leave little time for anything else. The good news? There are ways to manage and reduce the hold these rituals have on your life. When Rituals Are Helpful vs. Harmful Not all rituals are destructive. Sometimes they can be beneficial. For example, routines like checking that the stove is turned off or washing your hands before eating serve practical purposes. However, when they -become irrational or excessive, they can take over your life and cause significant distress. Understand your rituals The first step in managing your impractical rituals is to understand the reason they bring you comfort. Here are some questions you can ask yourself to help you properly identify your rituals and better understand them. What specific actions do I feel compelled to repeat? Start by identifying the exact behaviors that you feel you must perform. Is it locking the door multiple times, washing your hands excessively, or mentally repeating a phrase? What triggers these actions? Consider what situations, thoughts, or emotions make you feel the need to perform these actions. Is it stress, or a fear of something going wrong? What do I hope to achieve by performing these rituals? Think about what you believe will happen if you don’t perform the ritual. Are you trying to prevent something bad from happening or is [...]

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Coping Mechanisms for Stress: How to Help Your Body and Mind

Coping Mechanisms for Stress: How to Help Your Body and Mind

Kate MotaungSeptember 30th, 2024|Anger Issues, Anxiety, Depression, Featured, Grief Counseling, Psychological Testing|

What stress is looking back at you today from the mirror? The signs of stress are visible in the faces and behaviors of many people, and you and I are likely no different. The difference, however, is in how we face these challenges. We face many hurdles that are simply too high and too wide to get around and navigate sensibly, and too tough to get through on our own. These challenges are interpreted by our minds and bodies as stressful situations. After we experience a traumatic event, the human psyche is prone to have a strong and lingering reaction. It is important to be proactive and learn healthy coping mechanisms for stress, including getting the appropriate care and support we need to dial down our symptoms and stressful feelings. Frequently, reactions to a stressful event are physical and emotional and can include the following factors: An inclination to use more tobacco, alcohol, or other substances that we feel will help us cope. We may experience physical reactions like body pains, headaches, rashes on our skin, and tummy problems. Worsening chronic health problems. Being able to make decisions, fall and stay asleep, and concentrate. Denial and withdrawal. Feelings of anger, fear, frustration, numbness, sadness, shock, and worry. A decline in mental health. Changes in our appetite, levels of energy, desires, and even interests. Being affected by others’ anger and abuse of power, or even the consequences of our own mistakes can lead us to feel grief, anxiety, stress, and worry. It may be a mass shooting or natural disaster, a layoff, or a car accident with crippling financial consequences. Here we discuss some of the ways that you can help not only yourself but also others in your community, to know more about coping mechanisms for stress. Healthy coping [...]

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Strategies for Managing Anxiety and Anger During Daily Commutes

Strategies for Managing Anxiety and Anger During Daily Commutes

Stephanie KramerAugust 28th, 2024|Anger Issues, Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

According to the United States Census Bureau, the average commute in America has increased over the last few years to a new high of about an hour per day roundtrip. This means that the average adult spends nearly twenty hours a month traveling to and from their daily responsibilities. If you struggle with anxiety and anger, this has all the ingredients for an outburst. Knowing that you are facing potential triggers is the first step in learning to avoid them. Tips to manage anxiety and anger Here are some other tips to help you manage your anxiety and anger during your daily commute. Eat a balanced breakfast Being “hangry” (being simultaneously hungry and angry) is a real thing. Often our emotions are highest when we are hungry. Allowing enough time in your morning routine to have a healthy breakfast will help regulate your emotions. Include protein and healthy fats to stabilize blood sugar levels. Limit stimulants Avoid sugar and caffeine which can exacerbate anxiety symptoms. Before and during your commute drink water or herbal tea instead of coffee or sugary drinks. Get plenty of sleep As tempting as it is to stay up all night and flip through social media, getting a good night’s rest the night before can help you stay emotionally balanced throughout the day. Be prepared Being prepared is key to reducing anxiety. Before your commute, take a few minutes to ensure that everything you need is ready. This might include planning your route and checking for possible delays, packing your bag the night before, and setting out your clothes ahead of time to minimize morning decisions. Avoid triggers If you know that you get emotionally charged from listening to sports broadcasts or heated political debates, don’t. If driving past your ex-fiancée’s house will put you [...]

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Making Sense of Christian Divorce and Finding Support

Making Sense of Christian Divorce and Finding Support

Jennifer KooshianAugust 14th, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Relationships can run the gamut from beautiful and fulfilling to traumatic and life-altering. It’s not always easy to know when to walk away from a relationship; perhaps this is just a bad season and good times are just around the corner. Or, given time and some elbow grease, things could turn around. These and many other thoughts could accompany the conviction to hang in there for another day or another year and put off the contemplation of divorce. The life and the story of any marriage is a unique one, and it can be difficult to walk others through the intricacies of each decision and action that has led you to the point of seeking a divorce. Ending a relationship, much less a marriage, is a step that ought to be undertaken thoughtfully; at least with as much thought as what you applied to enter the relationship to begin with. This article will attempt to highlight some considerations to make before stepping toward divorce. Implications and reasons for divorce There are many reasons why a person could decide to get divorced. Some of the main reasons why people get divorced include issues as diverse as infidelity, conflict over money, a lack of commitment, domestic violence and other forms of abuse, differences over roles and division of labor in the family, incompatible or conflicting parenting styles, lack of family support, emotional neglect, and religious and cultural differences, to name a few. These reasons may just be words on a page for some, but for the person who has lived through those conflicts, the emotional abandonment, or financial strain, they may be reminders of a dark and painful time that’s probably best forgotten. Whatever else it might be, the thought of getting a divorce might feel like getting a reprieve from [...]

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Symptoms of ADHD in Children: Inattentive Type and Hyperactive-Impulsive Type

Symptoms of ADHD in Children: Inattentive Type and Hyperactive-Impulsive Type

Sandra SteinJuly 17th, 2024|ADHD/ADD, Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Featured|

Does your child have trouble sitting still or paying attention? Is he or she impulsive and disruptive? Have you ever found yourself wondering whether this is normal behavior for a child their age or whether it might be a sign of ADHD? If so, this article on the symptoms of ADHD in children may contain the answers to your questions and help you understand the difference. What is ADHD? ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) is a common neurodevelopmental disorder that typically appears in early childhood and affects a child’s behavior, causing difficulties in their day-to-day life. Symptoms are categorized in one of three ways – predominantly inattentive, predominantly hyperactive-impulsive, or a combination of the two. Taken individually, symptoms such as a short attention span or hyperactivity do not necessarily mean your child has ADHD. Nearly all children at one time or another do things that children with ADHD do, such as not pay attention, fidget, get distracted, have trouble waiting their turn, act impulsively, or run when told to walk. But if they are also able to sit still, be focused, and control themselves at least part of the time, it is probably not an indicator of ADHD. Children with ADHD are not able to do that. For them, it’s not a sometimes thing. Symptoms of ADHD in children According to the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) there are eighteen behaviors that can indicate that a child might have ADHD. Nine of these fall under the category of inattention, and the other nine under hyperactive-impulsive. To be diagnosed with ADHD, children under 17 years of age must exhibit six or more symptoms in either category (five or more if they are 17 or older), have had them for at least six months, and several of [...]

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